Take a hint

You strategically place bridal magazines around the house. You take road trips while listening to a custom-made CD in which every song includes the words "I do."

You sleep in a white lingerie getup that includes a veil.

He has to understand you're ready to get married, right?

Well, maybe not.

Here, one guy accurately notes that "men are not the masters of the subtle," as noted by the accompanying list of 5 female hints guys don't get.

I admit to falling into the hint trap in relationships. It's just so much easier than being direct.

Plus, I think I speak on the behalf of many women when I emphasize that hints give us something to obsess over, and that's always fun.

Nothing beats hours alone spent planning how you're going to "accidentally" leave a Cosmo article entitled "How I got him to say 'I love you'" at your boyfriend's apartment.

While hints may be unsuccessful in relationships, they're even more futile on the meet market scene.

Given the skewed gender ratio in Columbus, I've learned it's best to directly say "no" if you're not interested in a guy's offer to dance.

Otherwise, you end up playing the "I'll dance with you while I wait for my faux lesbian friends to drag me away" charade.

And that's just a waste of time.